winter song

i'm weary

and my roots are brittle and dry

another shaken leave

is driftin' toward the sky

and i wonder when

spring will come again

so i can open up

and breathe new life

but these seasons of change 

don't come easily

you have to stand strong against the blistery winds of life

and you and feel the pain,

but only in the present tense

and remember that you're still alive

snow paints my skin

and fills in my gnarly nots

white-washing all my aches and pain

and my rings of life, 

and these nests in my hands

bring promise of better days

but these seasons of change 

don't come easily

you have to stand strong against the blistery winds of life

and you and fill the pain,

by livin' in the present tense

and remember that you're still alive

i'm still alive

Winter Park With Snow Covered Trees

by artist Elena Elisseeva

oppression is not the answer, love is

i see it like it is
and i call it like i see it
i don't pretend to be anything but me

i'm a radical who doesn't subscribe to labels
i'm a human being, so treat me like one

i'm not going to talk like a girl

i'm not going to let you define the rules

you're not doing any favors

when you ask me to bend down and kiss your feet

so let's do this together
try loosening your grip
relinquish some of your power
and trust you'll still be respected

i know what it's like to be a minority
sisters and brothers of another color
but this abhorrent violence and daily oppression
is not something i've ever had to endure

so let's raise our voices together

know that you are not alone

justice and love will prevail

trust that a new act is beginning now

so let's do this together
try loosening your grip
relinquish some of your power
and trust you'll still be respected

'cause there's always love
there's always love
there's always love, yeah there's always love
there's always love, peace, justice and harmony
there's always love

oooh, there's always love

image courtesy of Wikipedia

con tu luz, si se puedes

this song is to remind you that you are infinite
this song is to remind you that this is not all there is

the world is a beautiful place if you let it be
it's just about shifting what it is you see
and those of us who taint the waters are few and far between

this song is to remind you that your heart is something, too
this song is to remind you that love looks good on you

and you can hate your self if you choose to
but i'm never going to give up on you
'cause i see your beauty and majesty 
and your light is blinding

those of us who hurt ourselves
go on to hurt each other

con tu luz, si se puedes

con tu luz, si se puedes

con tu luz, si se puedes

con tu luz, si se puedes

i'm myself

it's the way that you make me feel
you treat me like i'm a piece of meat
and you tell me that i'm too fuckin' sweet
well, it's not my problem, but yours

i'm kind a generous and loving, too
and if you think that makes me weak, then that's on you
for it takes more balls that you'll ever have
to show up be compassionate and be
yourself.
that's who i am
i'm myself

i can't deny that i'm loud mouth
i can't deny that i have a huge heart
i can't deny that i'm outgoing
i can't deny that i'm an artist
if that makes you uncomfortable
then that's on you

i'm considerate of other people's space
i don't disrespect your boundaries
so stop trying to bulldoze over mine
my smile's not an invite for you to harass me
my hug doesn't warrant you to touch my ass
i'm a fucking human so stop sexualizing me
and if you have a problem, it's yours and not mine
yeah, if you have a problem it's yours and not mine

it's not my fault that i'm pretty
it's not my fault that i'm unafraid
so stop trying to punish me
i'm not going to apologize for how i feel
i'm not responsible for how you feel

i'm an individual with a heart of gold
so stop tryin' to put your shit on me, yeah
and stop tellin' me what to believe

i'm kind a generous and loving, too
and if you think that makes me weak, then that's on you
for it takes more balls that you'll ever have
to show up be compassionate and be
yourself.
that's who i am
i'm myself

sick girls finish last

nobody wants to help you if you're the sick girl

especially if you say things that contradict their lifestyle choices
especially if you confront them with their own trauma
especially if you speak the truth
about oppression
inequality
their own choices

see, nobody invited debby downer to the party
nobody wants to see her crying in the corner
mascara running
such an unsightly display of pain

or we'll shame you
"god, you're so unhealthy"
you did this to yourself

and we won't be there to help you pick up the remains
after your life comes crashing down
because the mental health system failed
the family failed
the guidance counselors failed
the teachers failed
the schooling failed
the lack of parenting failed
the poverty failed
the partners failed
the trauma failed
the ones who stood by and watched failed
the ones who "don't talk about emotions" failed
the college degree failed
the friends failed
the ones who knew, but did nothing failed
the community failed
the abuse failed
the speaking out failed
the fighting failed
the pushing through the pain failed
the doing-it-yourself because no one else will do it for you failed
the self-medication failed
the attempts of a better life failed

Broken Heart 
by Artist Jee Young Lee

i'm alive

i feel ashamed because i cried today

i let my emotions get the best of me
but then i think about all the things i've survived
and damn i'm grateful that i'm alive

and i won't feel bad today, no
it's ok to feel the pain, oh

there's so many things that i don't understand
i'm learnin' that it's not my job to figure it out

so i live my life everyday
trusting that i am on my way

and i might not be understood, no
but i'm never leaving my side, oh

people may perceive me like i'm missing a screw
well, that's ok.
i know others who are crazy, too

so i surround myself with positivity
and loved ones who believe in me
yes, loved ones who believe in  me

i think about all the things i survived
and damn i'm grateful that i'm alive.

tending the land, love will see us through

i've been told "we are what we sow"
but my broken back
and cracked hands
have grown old
seeds of love
indifference
and i wonder when these crops will yield new life

maybe it's not my job to tend all the land

maybe i'm doin' the best i can

maybe it's up to you

maybe it's your job, too

earth's keepers

my sister's tears

washes away all my hopes and fears

soil erosion 

a thunderous sky

fills my heart and i start to cry

maybe this is all out of our hands

maybe we're doin' the best we can

maybe it's not up to you

maybe love will see us through

drought uncovered

a white dove dies

tilling the land, and we soften unto night

new hope blossoms

from volunteers

seeds long forgotten 

after all these years

maybe this is all a part of the plan

maybe we're doin' the best we can

maybe it's not up to you

maybe the love will see us through

maybe the light will shine through

maybe the love will see us through

#jada's song

i bared my teeth that can chew through anything
especially those whose reflections i see
you tell me that i'm too damn angry
i'm sorry, but i disagree

i'm just a woman who's been hurt and betrayed

i know that there was life before you
i recognize not all men are assholes
so please forgive me if my tinted lenses
are not coming up all roses

i'm just a woman who's been hurt and betrayed

daily oppression is a reg'lar occurrence
walkin' down the street and i'm too 'fraid to speak
women's clitoris's are being cut off
girls are being murdered 'cause they want to read

we're just women and we've been hurt and betrayed

jada i love you

you're so bold and beautiful

not letting tragedy get in your way

you showed your face

and denounced their stigma 

thank you for being an inspiration  

i am jada, and i am not afraid

i am jada, and i am on my way

we are women and we are not afraid

we are women and we are healing today

we are women and we are on our way

image courtesy of Independent magazine

festering fight--invisible in america

i do not know what it's like to be black

i can only relate in so much as i have felt the lack

of opportunity

that society has given to me

or all the bullshit my family taught me to believe

it makes me wonder how you keep from going under

ha-ha-ha-ha-ha

we sit in our caves of privilege

isolated by indifference

the notion that "it's their problem, not mine"

or "ours"

or we fail to see that it's all our responsibility

to educate

liberate our minds

and free the binds of hate

but who's to blame, really?

the person who perpetuates the notions of those set before us?

socialization is so hard to overcome.

so insidiously ingrained 

that we all have to strain

to see the vastness

of inequality.

image courtesy of Nobody Coe's Black Lives Matter on pinterest

PTSD in me

he said.


he said that i talk too much
he said that i don't do anything right
he said that i'm a slut
he said that i'm an idiot
he said that i'm dumb
he said that my art is lame
he said that feminism is irrelevant
he said that i'm "one of those girls"
he said that i'm acting like a victim
he said that i had it coming
he said that it wouldn't have happened had i not been sans bra
he said "maybe if your nipples weren't showing"
he said that "we all say inappropriate things"
he said that i was making it up
he said that i was choosing to see it that way
he said that it was just my ego
he said that i wasn't good enough
he said that i'll never be good enough
he said that i'm shaming him for letting him know that i'm offended
he said that i'm trying to control him
he said that i expect too much out of him
he said that if i had sex with him that i'd be doing my patriotic duty of supporting the troops
he said that he could tell that i wasn't into it
he said that i was tight
he said that my pussy was wet
he said that he wanted to fuck me hard
he said that he was gonna cum on my titties
he said that i don't talk in a way that's worth listening to
he said that i don't possess intelligence--like he does
he said that it's my stress, and that the reality i'm seeing is invalid
he said that playing with my hair means i'm flirting
he said all men think about sex all of the time
he said "look at her ass"
he said that my ass is super sexy
he said that he'd like to start a future with me
he said that i cry too much
he said that i should have that abortion
he said that he was relieved when i did
he said that it was my choice when it wasn't
he said that i struggle for power
he said that i don't understand
he said that i needed to stick up for myself--that i let it happen
he said that i was a bitch
he said that bending over like that was me seeking attention
he said that i take things "too personally"
he said that i'm "too sensitive"
he said that i'm "too politically correct"
he said that i had "itty titties"
he said that i had "thunder thighs"
he said that i had a "j-lo booty"
he said that i should have long finger nails
he said that i should wear pink
he said that i should lick it
he said that i live in the past
he said that it's not as bad as i think